Screaming Sphincter

I was a bit apprehensive with this one. A bottle entitled "Screaming Sphincter" and boldly desribed as "A Burning Painus Within The Anus" simply had me puckering at the thought. With a name like that there must be some devious concoction inside the glass vile that would turn my regularity into something akin to firing fiery aft photon torpedos from a Klingon Bird of Prey. Because I am an ethusiast, and I care for my readers, I decided to venture forward with the horrid onslaught to my bowels.
Screaming Sphincter is a cayenne pepper sauce made to be used as an every day flavor enhancer. As I sat down, I poured a generous helping into my handy dandy tablespoon sauce taster. It was a nice brick red color and had a wonderful smell of fresh cayenne. The viscosity was thin but not too thin. It had a thickness that was good for covering what ever it was placed on.
I breathed out and then put the spoon full of Screaming Sphincter in my mouth. I've been fooled by pepper sauces before, so I was bracing myself just incase this thing burned my socks off. It was pleasantly tangy, salty and had high acidity from a lot of distilled vinegar. It had a good cayenne peppery taste and smell going on in my palate but it lacked in heat. By itself it wasn't half bad and on the heat level I would have to put it way below Tabasco. A starter sauce for sure.
I added a dash of the sauce to my afternoon soup but didn't really taste any variance in flavor. I added another and another. I ended up adding half the bottle before I could taste the sauce in my soup. It was very weak in flavor when paired up with a simple chicken noodle soup. I put some dashes on my bologna sandwich and found the same thing. It didn't really add to the flavor of the food I was eating. I imagined that if I had something bland, like grits, then the sauce would be a sure win but with regular food that had flavor it absolutely failed to connect.[ad 2]
Admittedly I was a bit upset. With such an intimidating name I was hoping for the worst as I took care of the morning pains, but instead I was faced with a tasteless sauce that had no bite whatsoever. I can possibly see some uses for the sauce, perhaps in a sourcream based dip for chips, on top of spaghetti, or even in a bloody mary but not much more. As an all purpose flavor enhancer, I believe it would be good for young kids to use; especially after explaining to them what a sphincter is.
I would rate this about 900-1100 scoville. The price was affordable at $5.99 but as far as flavor was concerned, it was good by itself but when paired with actual food it was tasteless.

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